Category Archives: Entrepreneurial services

The Woman in the Mirror


“Who is the woman in the mirror?”  I sometimes ask that question when I’m standing in front of a mirror and often the answer is “I don’t know”.  Maybe it’s because it’s part of transitioning through stages of my life or I’m in the process of reinventing myself (again) and it could also be that I’ve been focussing inward (looking at my life) for too long rather than outward (living my life).  This happens a lot when I’m in discovery mode rather than living mode.  It’s not a bad thing but it is something to be aware of and adjust when I spend too much time in that space.  There are times and places for both modes when I’m in the process of exploring who I am as a person.  For those of us going through the process of discovering who we are, it’s an important part of the process.

It seems that life is a series of opposites with examples everywhere we look.  There are the yin and yang, the positive and negative, the good and bad, the up and down, the here and there, now and then, back and forth, young and old, hot and cold, day and night, sunrise and sunset, the list goes on and on. It’s important to remember this when you are asking the question, “who am I?” Why is it important? Because we are many things and often we get stuck behind the image of who we think we are and it’s often the source of your limiting belief about yourself. One of my most limiting beliefs, in the past, was “Others won’t like me if they really knew me”.  This belief is quite common as I hear other women talk about being frauds and inauthentic.  The issue is, I have an idea of who I am based on traits, thoughts, and actions and other people (from their perspective) do as well.  So who am I?  The answer is: I am the collective sum of all the perspectives including mine!

First of all, let me be very clear, there is nothing wrong here, and exploring this topic can be fun and quite insightful!  In my experience, when I’m seeing myself as less than desirable or ugly or unlovable, I am spending too much time listening to my internal voice, the one connected to some limiting belief I haven’t eradicated yet. When I am listening to others I see a completely different woman and it has a huge effect on how I feel! Whose perspective should I trust to be true, mine, or theirs?  As I have found out there is no clear answer to this question.  It’s important to understand who you are and you are free to create your own definition BUT (and a big but at that) if your day to day life experience includes struggle, hardship, anger (yours or others toward you) and you no longer want that in your life then it’s important to understand how others see you because, in their perspective, you will find views of you that you may not be aware of.  Your ways of being that are not in alignment with who you think you are.

How can you find out how you appear to others?  Well, just ask and listen to what they have to say.  Listen without judgment, without emotion, and without making them wrong for sharing their perspective.  The safer you make this for them the more honest they will be with you.  You do have to accept what they share and understand it’s only their perspective.  Your ‘way of being’ attracts “types” of people into your life, these people are the mirror of your way of being, do you like what you see?  If you don’t then it’s time to have a closer look at who you are in the world.

Remember the movie “It’s a Wonderful Life”?  The main character, George, gets a do-over in his life when he becomes aware of who he is in the eyes of others and so do you if you want your life to be different!

IMPORTANT NOTE: I am not suggesting that you look to others to define who you are and how you should be, I am suggesting that you pay attention to how others respond/react to you for clues when you are frustrated or unhappy in your life.  If you would like coaching to explore this topic for yourself, feel free to contact me for options.

Standing in the Space of Upset


One of the most challenging places to stand as a coach is in the space of upset.  In that moment, when there is a need to take an unpopular position to cause a breakthrough for a client, I run the risk of losing the client because of the stand.  Why, as a coach, would I put myself in that position?  Because I believe that significant growth comes out of our most difficult moments and my job is to cause movement in areas of my client’s lives where historically there has never been movement before.

iStock_000001237210XSmallWhen I’m standing in the space of upset it’s never without pre-thought around “will it make a difference?” and “am I prepared for the consequences of taking a strong stand?”  The answers to those questions are very clear for me before I take that stand.
“Will it make a difference?”  As I mentioned before I do believe we gain significant growth out of adverse situations and there are times when my clients don’t like me for what I have to say.   I have been told that being a coach is not a popularity contest and through my experiences I can say this is true.  I know being the coach they liked would make me feel great and it doesn’t serve my clients needs.  In order to be an effective coach it has to be about the client and I want to make a difference in lives of my clients.  As an effective coach clients get what they came for and comfortably share my services with others.
“Am I prepared for the consequences of taking a strong stand?”  The answer is always YES because I am determined to cause movement in the lives of my clients so they will have results they could only imagine as possible before they started working with me as their coach.  Otherwise why would they hire me?  There are plenty of self-help books, videos, webinars and seminars available with all the same information I share and lots of opportunity to do what needs to be done without my help so why would client’s hire me?  Because I understand what it’s like to stand in their shoes, I know what’s coming and I’m prepared to go to the end of the earth for my clients even if it means making them dislike me in the process.  I am a stand for my clients to finally have movement in areas of their lives where historically no movement has come before.
Thank goodness there is more to being a coach than taking difficult stands and thank goodness clients can count on me for having the skills to take those difficult stands.  I have spent many years watching a variety of coaches and pulled from each one, something of value to add to my skill set.  I believe they have all contributed to making me a better coach for others and for this I am grateful.
Lisa Johnston-Williams
Personal Lifestyle Coach services are provided by LD Williams. Times/dates/fees are arranged as per client’s needs and agreed upon before coaching services begin. LD Williams has been providing advice and coaching services for over 20 yrs to men and women across North America. Her services are non-medical in nature and based on her personal life experiences.

2015 in review


The WordPress.com stats helper monkeys prepared a 2015 annual report for this blog.

Here’s an excerpt:

A San Francisco cable car holds 60 people. This blog was viewed about 1,200 times in 2015. If it were a cable car, it would take about 20 trips to carry that many people.

Click here to see the complete report.

Why Do It?


Wow!  Recently I have been delving into the world of online dating to better understand this way of connecting and my eyes have been opened to a curious phenomenon.  People (it seems to be balanced between men and women) appear to post false information about themselves and use old pictures in their profiles.  WHY ARE THEY DOING THIS?

What do they hope to gain with this approach?  Do they hope that people will look past the dishonesty once they meet in person?  Apparently it’s not happening that way at all.  According to the responses I have received the number one turn off for both men and women is misrepresentation and the effect of the experience affects their future connections.

According to the men and women who shared their experiences with me the experience of that dishonesty coloured their view of online dating and made it difficult to see the real beauty of the person they met.   The areas of misrepresentation that top the list are: age, education, true wants and most importantly, current image of the person in the profile.   If you are looking to find that special someone and create a love connection using the online dating services honesty from the start is a must in these areas.

I have read many profiles and the ones that stand out for me are clear, concise, captivating and brief.  When I say brief I don’t mean a couple of sentences or arm’s length.  Interesting enough the profiles that get read are the ones that use point form outlining what the person has to offer and what they are looking for.  Sounds like applying for a job?  I think the principles are similar and the approach can be as well.

I recommend starting with accurate bio info and current pictures to start you search off on the best possible foot.  The right person is going to connect with you because of who you truly are and will accept you for who you are not.  All you have to do is trust they will and do the same for them.

If you are interested in having me view your profile or work with you in creating your profile please feel free to contact me through this post.  I will respond to all legitimate inquiries and comments.

Lisa Johnston-Williams
Personal Lifestyle Coach services are provided by LD Williams. Times/dates/fees are arranged as per client’s needs and agreed upon before coaching services begin. LD Williams has been providing advice and coaching services for over 20 yrs to men and women across North America. Her services are non-medical in nature and based on her personal life experiences.

Business Start up Best Solutions


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5 Essential Steps for Business Startups

(click the pic to see what they are)

 

 

 

 

 

 

Lisa Johnston-Williams
 
Personal Lifestyle Coach services are provided by LD Williams. Times/dates/fees are arranged as per client’s needs and agreed upon before coaching services begin. LD Williams has been providing advice and coaching services for over 20 yrs to men and women across North America. Her services are non-medical in nature and based on her personal life experiences.