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Time to Take Out the Trash


Look familiar?

photo credit to abundancetapestry.com

Trash talk happens.  When it does, do you listen or put it in it’s place?

Are you aware of your “trash talk?”  Not sure?  I can tell you it comes from that little voice in your head that just said “what is she talking about? and I don’t hear voices in my head!”  Yes, that little voice.  If you have spent anytime listening to that voice chances are you have hear a lot of trash talk.  You are not alone in this experience and it’s an epidemic in our society.  It is safe to say the source of our insecurities, lack of confidence and diminished view of self-worth is fuelled by trash talk and it’s time to take out the trash for good!

There is an imaginary muscle in our thoughts that, when exercised, can toss the trash when you use it, of course, and like any muscle regular exercise is needed.  Staying toned is vital to keeping the trash at a manageable level and in check at all times.  Two things that are important to understand, 1. you will never rid yourself of trash talk completely and 2. you CAN keep it at a minimum so it’s not running your life.

When it comes to any new exercise regime it’s vital to take note of where you are right now and to have a goal in mind that you are reaching for.  What happens between those two points requires consistent practice through focus, commitment and disciplined determination.  I have a quote that I use as a tagline in my emails that says:

“discipline is simply choosing between what I want right now and what I want most”

I read it every time I send an email as a reminder of what I want most in my life.  What quote are you using to remind yourself of what’s important to you?  If you don’t have one, find one that resonates with you and use it!

Now that you are aware of your trash talk, what kind of things are you hearing?  Do you catch yourself agreeing with your little voice?  Are you as horrible as your little voice says?  What we say to ourselves is horrendous and what’s really amazing is we would never allow others to say these things to us so why do we allow ourselves?  Think about it?  If someone told you that you were a loser, you will never amount to anything in your life, you are not good enough or pretty enough or you certainly don’t deserve to be happy.  You would likely give them a full fisted sandwich in the kisser!  So why do we listen to the little voice?

There was a time in our history, billions of years ago that little voice came in handy, it was the voice of reason when human beings roamed the earth in search of food and shelter.  It was every man (woman) for themselves and definitely animal eat animal world out there.  Wait a minute!  It sounds like nothing has changed in a billion years!!!  Our little voice is a vital part of our survival in this world and unfortunately it doesn’t know when to shut up and keep it’s opinions to itself. Kidding aside that little voice has saved your life at some point and for that you can be grateful.  The downside of having our little voice in our heads is when it goes into negative mode and constantly bombards you with thoughts that are hurtful and damaging and this is where you need to take charge.

Most people think that life happens to them, what they don’t realize is that we are capable of creating our lives.  Not only capable but responsible!  What is so magical at this point is when we take responsibility for the creation of our lives we also gain the power to create life anyway that we want.

What do you want?

Do you have any idea of what you truly want in your life?  Most of us say “yes” but stop and think about the question and most of you will be completely blank.  I know because I have gone through this exercise myself and I go through it with my clients. I still haven’t met anyone who could clearly answer the question.  Why not?  Well, it all comes back to that pesky little voice and the trash it’s been sharing with us over the years.  Nasty!

The bottom line is manage the little voice, have it work for you rather than against you and you can have what ever your little heart desires.

Yes, you can have it all

Standing in the Space of Upset


One of the most challenging places to stand as a coach is in the space of upset.  In that moment, when there is a need to take an unpopular position to cause a breakthrough for a client, I run the risk of losing the client because of the stand.  Why, as a coach, would I put myself in that position?  Because I believe that significant growth comes out of our most difficult moments and my job is to cause movement in areas of my client’s lives where historically there has never been movement before.

iStock_000001237210XSmallWhen I’m standing in the space of upset it’s never without pre-thought around “will it make a difference?” and “am I prepared for the consequences of taking a strong stand?”  The answers to those questions are very clear for me before I take that stand.
“Will it make a difference?”  As I mentioned before I do believe we gain significant growth out of adverse situations and there are times when my clients don’t like me for what I have to say.   I have been told that being a coach is not a popularity contest and through my experiences I can say this is true.  I know being the coach they liked would make me feel great and it doesn’t serve my clients needs.  In order to be an effective coach it has to be about the client and I want to make a difference in lives of my clients.  As an effective coach clients get what they came for and comfortably share my services with others.
“Am I prepared for the consequences of taking a strong stand?”  The answer is always YES because I am determined to cause movement in the lives of my clients so they will have results they could only imagine as possible before they started working with me as their coach.  Otherwise why would they hire me?  There are plenty of self-help books, videos, webinars and seminars available with all the same information I share and lots of opportunity to do what needs to be done without my help so why would client’s hire me?  Because I understand what it’s like to stand in their shoes, I know what’s coming and I’m prepared to go to the end of the earth for my clients even if it means making them dislike me in the process.  I am a stand for my clients to finally have movement in areas of their lives where historically no movement has come before.
Thank goodness there is more to being a coach than taking difficult stands and thank goodness clients can count on me for having the skills to take those difficult stands.  I have spent many years watching a variety of coaches and pulled from each one, something of value to add to my skill set.  I believe they have all contributed to making me a better coach for others and for this I am grateful.
Lisa Johnston-Williams
Personal Lifestyle Coach services are provided by LD Williams. Times/dates/fees are arranged as per client’s needs and agreed upon before coaching services begin. LD Williams has been providing advice and coaching services for over 20 yrs to men and women across North America. Her services are non-medical in nature and based on her personal life experiences.

A New Conversation For Job Seekers


Seven Effective Steps To Landing the Job of Your Dreams

Imagine a world where people loved what they did for a living and they looked forward to going to work everyday because they felt fulfillment and pride in what they did for their pay checks. Are you one of these people? Or are you one of the many people who are unhappy with their employment and are looking for a better place to work? I invite you to consider a new approach to job seeking to land the job of your dreams so you can be one of these people. Many people love what they do for work everyday and if you are not one of them then I invite you to consider that you are working somewhere that doesn’t work for you.

If you are someone who is working at a job just for the sake of a pay check I invite you to consider the possibility of looking for a job that does work for you. If you are considering my invitation then I invite you to consider taking it on with a whole new approach to job seeking by using these steps. I promise that you will land the job of your dreams if you follow these seven effective steps.

With this new approach I promise that Employers will see you differently and they will want you on their team. This approach is so powerful that jobs have been created where they were not available before just to make room for the person using this approach. I know because I used this approach myself and successfully landed the perfect job based on my needs and conditions. The response I received from the person hiring me was “you were so engaging you didn’t give me any other choice but to hire you”. Imagine someone saying that to you in a job interview! I can tell you it felt wonderful to hear. By using this approach I set myself up to give my best effort, have pride in my work and thoroughly enjoy the job I was hired to do.

A happy employee makes for a happy company as well and when everyone is operating from a good place everyone wins including business owners, fellow workers, customers AND you. Work with these steps in the order provided to be most efficient with your time and to maximize the benefits of your actions. Not only will you be rewarded with the outcome, your new Employer will thank you for being the extraordinary employee they had dreamed of having.

7 Effective Steps for Job Seekers

1. Wish list criteria and personal values – what made the wish list? Begin with creating a written list of everything that is important to you. Divide your page into 3 columns with the headings: Must Haves, Nice to Haves and Personal Values. Don’t worry at this point whether or not it’s reasonable, in fact, be unreasonable with this list. I call it a wish list because it needs to include everything you wish for without restraint.

Have fun with it by adding things that are outrageous, silly even unobtainable, believe me you’ll be surprised by two things in this exercise. First, you’ll be surprised at how much fun you had creating the list, you’ll feel like a child again back when you were free to create anything you wanted. Second, you have no idea what’s possible and everything is possible until someone says no. Creating your list without restrictions opens the door to possibilities you didn’t know existed.

Once your list is complete, read it again and imagine how you would feel if everything on your list was provided in your new job. Notice which items on your list feel more like “must haves” rather than would be “nice to haves”. For those that are really clear to you put a star beside them for future use.

Here are a few examples of my “must haves”, “nice to haves” and “personal values”. Must Haves – Flexible work schedule: 3 or 4 work days per week, Mondays off for family commitments and Thursdays off for Course commitments. Fun with lots of laughs and team spirit. Work with happy people and free to make people happy. Nice to Haves – Weekends off, Mai Tai‘s at the end of the workday, company paid massages 3 times a week, all expense paid trip anywhere in the world, a personal shopping excursion in Harrods in London England (all expense paid by the way) Personal Values – spending time with family and friends, a supportive work environment, fair wages, quality time off.

What would you like on your list? Make it fun and filled with things that mean something to you. My question to you is what’s important?

2. Skills assessment – what have you got already and what’s missing? This is a challenging task to complete, it requires you to appreciate what you already have in your repertoire of skills and if you are like most people you will undervalue your skills thinking they are not up to standard. Two of the most effective ways of uncovering your skill set are: 1. Hire a coach who is trained to ask the right questions, they will draw out your skill set through an inquiry process or 2. ask your friends and family what you do best according to them and believe them when they tell you. Either method will help you see what you already have as a skill or talent.

One other source to help you draw out your skills is to take skill assessment quizzes and tests; you will find many of these on the Internet free for your use. One word of caution with this method, don’t use your personal email address to access the test as you will be inundated with emails requesting further contact. I recommend having a public email address with Hotmail, Yahoo or Gmail so when you are required to submit your email for access you can do so at arms length. This keeps your personal email clear of unwanted emails and still allows you to accept emails for future reading, it’s also respectful to the people who took the time to provide you with the test questions.The list of skills you create will be used in step #3 of the process.

NOTE: you could also create an optional category called “want to haves” and add to that list skills you would like to have that you presently don’t have right now. This list would align with a dream job you may already have in mind and you are currently not doing that job because you don’t have these skills. This list would become part of the overall plan to work towards getting those skills.

3. Business + Skills matchmaking – what fits? So far you have created your wish list of must haves and nice to haves and listed your skills and talents. Now it’s time to create a wish list of companies that you would love to work for, again using the fun approach for the wish list I encourage you to create your list with companies of all sizes from small to huge.

You always wanted to work at Apple or Microsoft? Then add them to your list! What about the little Mom and Pop operation down the street, you know, the place that makes you feel like family every time you shop with them? Think about the businesses you know in your area or outside of your area. Think about where would you like to live if you could live anywhere?

Open yourself up to the possibilities of living and working anywhere in the world! This exercise takes imagination and courage to be free with your thoughts and is best done with a coach or a partner or group setting for inspiration. Create a “working-on-getting-work” group and see what opens up for you! Or work with a coach to bring out your thoughts. Using your skill assessment have a look at the list of businesses or companies you have identified to see which one of them would match your skills and create a working list of businesses to be used in step #4

4. Business Resume’ – who measures up to your standards and values? Now the hard and exciting work begins. Using the working list of businesses that need your skills identify the top 5 or 10 (depending on how long your list is).

NOTE: If you have a list shorter than 5 then I challenge you to dig deeper and lengthen your list to open yourself up to more possibilities and success in finding our dream job. Research the top 5 companies to learn all that you can about them, what’s important to them (their mission statement will give you a clue), look for what they stand for in their community, do you find yourself aligned with them? (refer to your values and what’s important to you) If not, take them off your list. You may have the skills they need and unless you feel connected to them with your values it is highly probable that you will not love your work experience with them and they will become yet another job you are doing without enjoyment.

5.  Interviewing the business – Do they measure up? The process of researching the businesses is to find the one you really want to work for and with. It’s possible you will find more than one and that’s okay too, the point is to become really familiar with the company that holds your future job because at some point they will want you to know who they are and it would be completely unexpected if you already knew a lot about them!

It’s important that the company’s values align with yours, it is the key for your success and vital if you are going to love what you do for work. Before you pick up the phone to make an appointment to see the human resource person within your dream company I invite you to prepare yourself properly for that call. what do you need to be prepared?

You need to be clear about what your intention for the call is, what you are requesting of the person you will be speaking with and very clear of the outcome that you want. For example the intention for the call maybe to find out who is the most appropriate person to speak with regarding employment or it maybe you have the correct person on the phone and your intention is to introduce yourself and set up an appointment to meet in person. You will be requesting the opportunity to meet with the HR manager or Owner of the business depending on the size of company.

Keep in mind you may receive one or both common answers at this point. Either “we are not hiring right now” or “send us your resume” and I encourage you to not let either of these statements stop you from requesting a moment of their time to meet in person.

Dialogue I have used around these are: “I understand that you are not hiring right now and I am requesting a short meeting with you to personally introduce myself and give you a reason to call me first when you are hiring” and “I will definitely be sending you my resume and I am requesting a short meeting with you to personally introduce myself so you see the person behind the words on the page”.

Be really clear that you are requesting a moment of their time and you won’t take no for an answer. For some of you this may seem a bit forward or pushy and I can tell you it’s refreshing to the person you are approaching. They will likely see this as you being determined, intentional and with purpose making your approach memorable and different than the other people applying for work.

This is your first impression and I promise they will notice and remember you when you use this approach. If you have come up against some resistance to meeting in person understand that it likely has something to do with time. I encourage you to keep your meeting short, no longer than 10 min, this way you stand a better chance of having your request granted if you let them know the meeting is very short. Now that you have your interview set with the company you love to work with doing the job you love to do you are ready for the final two steps.

6. Putting it all together – being the extraordinary employee they wished for! Do you know what it means to be an extraordinary employee? It takes commitment to doing your job to the best of your ability then doing it even better, it takes a “being of service” perspective where you do everything you do in the best interest of the company, the customers, your co-workers and yourself. It takes knowledge and understanding of what’s expected of you.

Being extraordinary not only provides your Employer with what they need, it makes you feel powerful with who you are being, you will feel appreciated and valued for who you are and what you do. Imagine how enjoyable your day would be if the company you worked for was full of extraordinary employees like you, it would have an atmosphere of support, encouragement, appreciation, fun, pleasure and camaraderie. It would be a place where you would find yourself saying “I love where I work and what I do for a living”. Who wouldn’t want that?

7. The meeting of the mindful – In the actual interview you want to be really clear about three things:

1. Share with them why you want to work with them.

2. Share with them how you see you are a good fit for them i.e. your skills fit their needs and

3. Let them know that you are truly grateful for the opportunity to share yourself with them and that you are open to taking on other jobs within the company if the one you wanted is not available because this is your dream company, right?

You WANT to work with them in any capacity that also works for them, show them your flexibility! Show them in your interview who you are as a person and why they would be better off with you on their team. I guarantee they will find a way to have you rather than let you go to their competition.

Be bold, be confident, be ready because you are exactly who they are looking for. On a personal note, if you are having trouble with this step don’t try to do it alone. This step can be challenging particularly if you have trouble seeing yourself as confident. If this is the case hire a coach to support you with this or at least talk with your friends and family and allow them to support you on this piece. Your goal is to land the job of your dreams and you need to do everything you can to realize this goal including asking others for support. Just do it!

Final thought: Take an entrepreneurial approach to job seeking and find the job you love – approaching job seeking like it’s your business will help put you in the right frame of mind to be the extraordinary employee Employers wish for. The entrepreneurial approach is to plan your work and work your plan – set up a process within this approach to keep you on track with your goal of finding your dream job. Put yourself in the owners shoes – would you hire you based on what they heard or saw from you so far? It’s in your best interest to be honest with yourself here, if something doesn’t work for you change it before you meet with your future Employer.

This approach will not be easy, it is definitely time consuming and it will require a high level of commitment on your part to see it through. I am certain that you will want give up at some point in the process and go back to the usual way people look for work. I urge you to be a stand for yourself and be committed to having a job you love not only because you are worth it but because loving what you do for work is so rewarding and fulfilling for you. Who wouldn’t want that present in their lives everyday?

Do what you need to do, if you need to find work as soon as possible go out and take any job to bring in a paycheque then focus your attention on using these steps to find your dream job and move on. One last thing, if you are using this approach please remember to thank the person who gave you the temporary job because without them you would not have had the opportunity to approach job seeking in a whole new manner.

My question for you is: Are you ready to go to work loving what you do for a living?  Contact me and get started…

Lisa Johnston-Williams
Personal Lifestyle Coach services are provided by LD Williams. Times/dates/fees are arranged as per client’s needs and agreed upon before coaching services begin. LD Williams has been providing advice and coaching services for over 20 yrs to men and women across North America. Her services are non-medical in nature and based on her personal life experiences.
 

Business Start up Best Solutions


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5 Essential Steps for Business Startups

(click the pic to see what they are)

 

 

 

 

 

 

Lisa Johnston-Williams
 
Personal Lifestyle Coach services are provided by LD Williams. Times/dates/fees are arranged as per client’s needs and agreed upon before coaching services begin. LD Williams has been providing advice and coaching services for over 20 yrs to men and women across North America. Her services are non-medical in nature and based on her personal life experiences.

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