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Oh my goodness, it is true…!


It is true! After many years of feeling “broken” and looking for ways to “fix” my life, I have finally found a piece of the puzzle that was missing for me in my quest to “fix” what I thought was wrong.  It turns out there is nothing wrong, nothing to fix and I’m not broken. I just need to adjust my perspective on life.

My studies regarding perspective or limiting beliefs (Biology of Beliefs written by Dr Bruce Lipton goes into great detail on this subject) has given me a new understanding of my habitual ways of being and how to change those habits that no longer work for me.  The exploration of the limiting beliefs that had me going through life repeating scenarios (have you ever said: “Damn it, I have been here before!” a reoccurring statement for me) is very revealing and enlightening at the same time.  The following is my understanding of where my beliefs were formed and the reformation of those beliefs from limiting to empowering using a technique called Psych-K.

Being Invisible

Limiting Belief #1 – “I am invisible” (a derivative of I’m not worthy)

Empowering Belief #1 – “I am seen for who I am today”

It hasn’t always been this way, looking back on my life I realize I had no idea that I was invisible. I was (still am) an outgoing adult, I am very social, an active volunteer in my community, someone others come to share their challenges in life.  People see me as a mother, wife, an entrepreneurial woman in the community but mostly, people have trouble recalling my name or they called me by some other name.  I wouldn’t correct them because I didn’t want to embarrass them and really it wasn’t a big deal, or so I thought at the time.  I recently became aware of how most things in my life are “no big deal” and I’m now realizing how that way of being, throughout life, was a significant indication of my invisibleness.

I was five years old when I became invisible, my story is not unlike many children of my age and I suspect there are many people wandering through their lives unaware that they are invisible just like I had.  What happened was my parent separated and the one person who saw me, my dad, left our family.  At the tender age of five I had been abandoned, my world, as I knew it, collapsed and I became invisible in my family.  No-one knew and the worst part is, because I wasn’t aware, I was to spend the next 50 years of my life living as an invisible person.

How could this happen and what was my evidence to support this thought?  First of all, let me clarify that I had not been abandoned as a child in the way we see abandonment.  Yes, my parents separated and for a very short time, I did see my dad on occasion.  I lived with my mother and five brothers until the age of seven when my mother remarried and introduced me to three more brothers and one sister.  My mother loved me and my stepfather did all that he could to provide for what we needed.  I had all my basic needs covered including a roof over my head, clothes on my body and food in my stomach.  I wasn’t a deprived child but I was a lonely child and I was a lost child in the group.  You can imagine how difficult it would have been to stand out in a family of 12.  Imagine how difficult it would have been to be the parents of 10 kids?  When you live life day to day in survival mode you can imagine that love and nurture were not part of our daily routine.  I don’t tell you this to gain your sympathy, I share this to give you insight into how I lived my life as an invisible child. being invisible

Don’t get me wrong I love my family and I know my family loves me because to this day I know if I was in need they would be there for me in a heartbeat.  What was missing in my life was the day to day show of affection and unconditional love that we all want in our lives and the result of what was missing in my life was more evidence of me being invisible.

 

I had plenty of evidence as a teenager but then, that is the time in our lives that I think most of us want to disappear.  Being invisible as a teenager worked for me.  As a teenager, I floated through life relatively unnoticed and without too many life-altering moments, in fact, I would say my teenage years were fairly uneventful and boring.  When I became a wife and mother I had many responsibilities and very little time to think about anything other than everyone else’s needs.  Like most Mothers, my time was not my own but consumed with daily tasks that made time pass very quickly.  Being invisible as a young mother was hard and welcomed at the same time.  It wasn’t until I wanted to follow my dreams, find my passion and purpose in life did this become a problem for me.  Every time I thought I found what I was looking for ‘something’ kept holding me back and I would go through many years of disappointment and frustration because I just couldn’t figure out what that ‘something’ was!

By using the Psych-K techniques I am reforming the beliefs I have habitually lived with all these years, quickly and effectively and creating the life I want now.

Lisa Johnston-Williams

Lisa Johnston has been experiencing life and exploring ways of being that gives new meaning to “Living life powerfully every day with passion and pleasure”. Her services are non-medical in nature and now include Psych-K techniques for life-changing results.

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Return to Empowerment


Red Rover, red rover, come on over!  The image is a portrait of NASA’s Mars Rover, “Opportunity”  who has been roaming the surface of Mars since January 25, 2004. A man made machine created to explore the surface of Mars in search of water or evidence of water for the purpose of supporting future generations of human beings. 

“Opportunity” has a number of features that are quite human-like, such as sight, taste and touch.  It (genderless) can hear and carries out orders or commands of which it then relays to the team of NASA professionals back on Earth.  Once the information is received and translated into words and images, the team gets to experience life on Mars as it is right now!  Like a human being, Opportunity is operating via its sub-conscious mind, carrying out tasks provided by its conscious mind (the human at the controls in NASA) and providing real-time experiences for us all to see (watch NASA videos here).  The scientific community has proven without a doubt that we, as humans, operate 95% from our sub-conscious mind (rover)  and only 5% from our conscious mind (spirit or command centre).  What does this all mean?  That essentially many of us are going through life asleep at the wheel and it’s time to wake up and be the driver!

” We are spiritual beings having a human experience”

We are Earth Rovers and we have chosen to roam the Earth, experience life here and report our experiences back to our spiritual being!  Sounds crazy, doesn’t it?

If you haven’t heard of these sciences: Epigenetics, Fractal Science, Quantum Physics or Mechanics, you will be challenged to follow this conversation. Not only are these sciences challenging all that we have been led to believe for centuries, they are answering the age-old questions “where did we come from” and “why are we here” in ways that actually make sense.  You can find out more about Epigenetics from Dr Bruce Lipton’s book “The Biology of Belief” where he introduces us to the ‘Rover’ concept of human beings. Consider for a moment, the possibility, that we are actually spirit beings in human bodies here on Earth to experience life?  What if this is true??? That would mean our bodies are nothing more than vehicles created for the purpose of collecting data (sight, touch, hear, taste) and reporting back to our spirit where ever it may be in the universe?  I know what you are thinking, she is completely off her rocker with this!  Am I really?  Humour me for a few minutes more…

If this is true then life just got a whole lot more exciting!  As a spiritual being roving the Earth I am free to choose my experiences! If I don’t like what I’m experiencing now then it’s my choice to change it!  Okay, this isn’t a new idea, it’s been talked about for many years. I have been aware of this since 2012 and it seems that knowing this hasn’t made a difference. (as revealed in previous posts)  You know what they say, “Life is in the journey!”.

Consider that what stands between (me) you and (my) your life desires is not:

  • other people
  • money
  • time
  • abilities
  • location

It may appear that these are the barriers and I assure you, they are not. No, the real barrier is (my) your perception or belief of those things and (I) you are in a position to change these anytime you want.

 “We are all living in cages with the door wide open” George Lucas
 The question is why?  If we are free to leave our caged lives why don’t we flee?  From what I’ve learned so far, the answer is because we didn’t know we could, we didn’t know how and for some of us, what we have done in the past didn’t work so we gave up.   Until now.
Now, we have knowledge (new science discoveries), new techniques & tools and new awareness. It’s time to break through the barriers that have held us back for so many years.
While on my life journey I have discovered the most effective tool to date called “Psych-K” and now I have the ability to assist others looking to reform their limiting beliefs or perceptions. In other words, get out of our cages an on to living our life’s wishes and desires.  Sounds too good to be true?  Nope, just changing the perception of what’s possible.

Giant Leaps From Little Steps


I have been known to say “knowing doesn’t make a difference” when talking about what to do when making changes in my life.  For example, I would say “I want to lose weight”, I know there are a billizion ways to lose weight and I’m not using any of them!  Every day someone is sharing their weight loss method that worked for them and if I used it I would lose weight too!  Yes, I believe this is true and knowing doesn’t make a difference!  I could lose the weight (I don’t have any medical reason why I can’t) and I choose not too.  Why? Because there is something else at play here that lives deep within my sub-conscious that stops me and I am on a quest to find it. Anytime I feel blocked or held back in my life the culprit is a limiting belief I hold in my sub-conscious mind.

Look familiar?

When you consider that we have more than 20,000 thoughts coursing through our brains every minute and that we are unaware of most of them, it’s possible there are thoughts/beliefs among them that are mucking up our lives.  As I read the “The Biology of Belief” by Dr Bruce Lipton I am more aware of these beliefs and how they influence my actions and inactions.

Knowing THIS does make a difference!

I now have the piece of life’s puzzle that I was missing!  Now I have what I need to change the list of beliefs I have been listening to most of my life, rewriting them in a way that empowers me.  Is it possible to change the words in my belief statements and create a new believable belief statement?  Could it be this simple?  The answer is YES and it’s highly effective when you combine the knowledge shared by Dr Lipton and the PSYCH-K process created by Rob Williams.

Here is a list of limiting beliefs I identified for myself in a previous post.  I will use them to show the transformational process I have gone through to eliminate these from my thoughts completely.  I mean completely!  I look at these statements and I no longer have any feelings about them, you have to understand, these words would cause tears to well up in my eyes just reading them and now, nothing at all!  I don’t believe them anymore and all it took is putting each one through the PSYCH-K process!  I was able to completely transform this list within an hour using the technique of identifying, rewriting, balancing and muscle testing to confirm the results.  Here’s the step by step process I went through:

  1. Identify limiting belief as I believe it to be
  2. Reword the belief into a positive statement using the following criteria (provided by Rob Williams) state in first person (I), use present tense (now, not later), use positive language, keep it short and emotionally meaningful to you
  3. Muscle test the statement, balance and lock it in place (there is a whole technique within here that is best done with someone who has taken the course or take the course yourself if you want to do on your own)

It sounds simple, doesn’t it?  It was and it wasn’t without its challenging parts.  I was challenged to reword these belief statements using the criteria.  I found myself using words like I wish, I want, will, none of which are present tense.  I also found my statements were too long and when I read them, they sounded good but I wasn’t really connected to them.  This was the longest part of the process for me and I believe it will get easier the more I practice.  For those of you reading this and may have these particular beliefs yourself, here are the words I used to rewrite them into empowering beliefs for myself.  Feel free to use them if they resonate with you too.

  • Original belief: I believe that when I ask for help no-one will be there for me
  • New belief: I feel love and support from others like a warm blanket on a cold day
  • Original belief: I believe that no matter what I do things will never change for me
  • New belief: Every step I take changes my view of life
  • Original belief: I believe that happiness is possible I just don’t know what will make me happy
  • New belief: I recognize happy moments in my life every day, both big and small
  • Old belief: I believe, despite multiple attempts to change it,  I am not where I want to be and I will never get there
  • New belief: I am exactly where I need to be and anywhere I want to go is reachable from here

When I read these words a smile has replaced the tears and the peacefulness I feel inside confirms the transformation for me.

It takes little steps to transform your limiting beliefs and the promise of giant leaps is real. Yes, it is that simple and it can be for you too.

What limiting beliefs hold you back in your life?

Time to Take Out the Trash


Look familiar?

photo credit to abundancetapestry.com

Trash talk happens.  When it does, do you listen or put it in it’s place?

Are you aware of your “trash talk?”  Not sure?  I can tell you it comes from that little voice in your head that just said “what is she talking about? and I don’t hear voices in my head!”  Yes, that little voice.  If you have spent anytime listening to that voice chances are you have hear a lot of trash talk.  You are not alone in this experience and it’s an epidemic in our society.  It is safe to say the source of our insecurities, lack of confidence and diminished view of self-worth is fuelled by trash talk and it’s time to take out the trash for good!

There is an imaginary muscle in our thoughts that, when exercised, can toss the trash when you use it, of course, and like any muscle regular exercise is needed.  Staying toned is vital to keeping the trash at a manageable level and in check at all times.  Two things that are important to understand, 1. you will never rid yourself of trash talk completely and 2. you CAN keep it at a minimum so it’s not running your life.

When it comes to any new exercise regime it’s vital to take note of where you are right now and to have a goal in mind that you are reaching for.  What happens between those two points requires consistent practice through focus, commitment and disciplined determination.  I have a quote that I use as a tagline in my emails that says:

“discipline is simply choosing between what I want right now and what I want most”

I read it every time I send an email as a reminder of what I want most in my life.  What quote are you using to remind yourself of what’s important to you?  If you don’t have one, find one that resonates with you and use it!

Now that you are aware of your trash talk, what kind of things are you hearing?  Do you catch yourself agreeing with your little voice?  Are you as horrible as your little voice says?  What we say to ourselves is horrendous and what’s really amazing is we would never allow others to say these things to us so why do we allow ourselves?  Think about it?  If someone told you that you were a loser, you will never amount to anything in your life, you are not good enough or pretty enough or you certainly don’t deserve to be happy.  You would likely give them a full fisted sandwich in the kisser!  So why do we listen to the little voice?

There was a time in our history, billions of years ago that little voice came in handy, it was the voice of reason when human beings roamed the earth in search of food and shelter.  It was every man (woman) for themselves and definitely animal eat animal world out there.  Wait a minute!  It sounds like nothing has changed in a billion years!!!  Our little voice is a vital part of our survival in this world and unfortunately it doesn’t know when to shut up and keep it’s opinions to itself. Kidding aside that little voice has saved your life at some point and for that you can be grateful.  The downside of having our little voice in our heads is when it goes into negative mode and constantly bombards you with thoughts that are hurtful and damaging and this is where you need to take charge.

Most people think that life happens to them, what they don’t realize is that we are capable of creating our lives.  Not only capable but responsible!  What is so magical at this point is when we take responsibility for the creation of our lives we also gain the power to create life anyway that we want.

What do you want?

Do you have any idea of what you truly want in your life?  Most of us say “yes” but stop and think about the question and most of you will be completely blank.  I know because I have gone through this exercise myself and I go through it with my clients. I still haven’t met anyone who could clearly answer the question.  Why not?  Well, it all comes back to that pesky little voice and the trash it’s been sharing with us over the years.  Nasty!

The bottom line is manage the little voice, have it work for you rather than against you and you can have what ever your little heart desires.

Yes, you can have it all

Standing in the Space of Upset


One of the most challenging places to stand as a coach is in the space of upset.  In that moment, when there is a need to take an unpopular position to cause a breakthrough for a client, I run the risk of losing the client because of the stand.  Why, as a coach, would I put myself in that position?  Because I believe that significant growth comes out of our most difficult moments and my job is to cause movement in areas of my client’s lives where historically there has never been movement before.

iStock_000001237210XSmallWhen I’m standing in the space of upset it’s never without pre-thought around “will it make a difference?” and “am I prepared for the consequences of taking a strong stand?”  The answers to those questions are very clear for me before I take that stand.
“Will it make a difference?”  As I mentioned before I do believe we gain significant growth out of adverse situations and there are times when my clients don’t like me for what I have to say.   I have been told that being a coach is not a popularity contest and through my experiences I can say this is true.  I know being the coach they liked would make me feel great and it doesn’t serve my clients needs.  In order to be an effective coach it has to be about the client and I want to make a difference in lives of my clients.  As an effective coach clients get what they came for and comfortably share my services with others.
“Am I prepared for the consequences of taking a strong stand?”  The answer is always YES because I am determined to cause movement in the lives of my clients so they will have results they could only imagine as possible before they started working with me as their coach.  Otherwise why would they hire me?  There are plenty of self-help books, videos, webinars and seminars available with all the same information I share and lots of opportunity to do what needs to be done without my help so why would client’s hire me?  Because I understand what it’s like to stand in their shoes, I know what’s coming and I’m prepared to go to the end of the earth for my clients even if it means making them dislike me in the process.  I am a stand for my clients to finally have movement in areas of their lives where historically no movement has come before.
Thank goodness there is more to being a coach than taking difficult stands and thank goodness clients can count on me for having the skills to take those difficult stands.  I have spent many years watching a variety of coaches and pulled from each one, something of value to add to my skill set.  I believe they have all contributed to making me a better coach for others and for this I am grateful.
Lisa Johnston-Williams
Personal Lifestyle Coach services are provided by LD Williams. Times/dates/fees are arranged as per client’s needs and agreed upon before coaching services begin. LD Williams has been providing advice and coaching services for over 20 yrs to men and women across North America. Her services are non-medical in nature and based on her personal life experiences.

What is Step 3?


iStock_000005289966XSmall

Continuing on with the conversation If you were free ~ what would you choose?  here is what works for me and is the next  step in my process of choosing what I want in my life. Step 3 is about discovering who I am, finding clarity in who I choose to be and identifying the words that resonate powerfully with me.  If you haven’t seen steps 1&2 I recommend that you read them first so step 3 will make sense to you.

            Step one                        Step two

 Who am I REALLY?  One thing that was quite clear to me before I worked on this piece, I thought I knew who I was and then I discovered that I had no clue!  I discovered that the people in my world saw me  differently than I saw myself.  I discovered that those people in my life saw me differently from each other as well.  When asked they used words like: a bold and courageous woman, a loving mother, a woman with confidence,  trustworthy, a leader, fun, happy, giving, caring, loving and generous.  No-one used words like sad, lost, unreliable, afraid, not good enough, unhappy, a fraud, lousy mother, terrible friend, and selfish.  The latter were words I used to describe myself so you could imagine my surprise when the people in my world said differently.  How could this be?  First of all I have to admit I did see some of the qualities others saw in me but I didn’t believe them and those words didn’t fit with the ones I identified with so I dismissed them as real.

So when did this all shift for me?  Well it was in 2012, I was sitting in a weekend seminar with 185 strangers listening to the guy at the front of the room.  We were deep into the question “who am I?”  I was getting quite frustrated with the question, we had been asking it for two days and it appeared I was no closer to the answer than when we started two days earlier!  I listened to others in the room grappling with the question just like me and it was apparent that none of us knew who we were.  Then something happened on the third day that I will never forget.  The guy at the front of the room was talking about words and that without words we didn’t exist.  Really?  He went on to say that without language nothing in our world would exist.  Are you kidding me?  Really?  Then he did something that finally made sense to me.  He held up his index finger, pointing it towards the ceiling, I looked up and saw nothing. He asked people in the room to describe what they saw and there were answers like: a hand, finger pointing, the number one, this way up and he said, now describe what you see without using words.  The room was silent.  I got two things out of this exercise. 1. without words we can not describe what we see and 2. every person who offered a description were correct and they all saw something different in the same thing.  This was  the answer to how we can see things differently in each other and why different people see things differently.  It was also the opening I needed to answer the question who am I.  So who am I?  I am my word.

I am my word and I can be any word I choose to be  who am I?

How powerful is that???  I stood up and asked, the guy at the front of the room, “do you mean to say that I can be any word I choose to be?”  The answer was ~ YES!  In that moment I had the most incredible moving experience I have ever felt, it was like my whole world spun on it’s axis and opened up to a brand new world of possibilities.  I could be any word I wanted to be!  Once this settled into my brain it created a whole new way of being that to this day still effective and powerful when I choose it to be.  One of my favourite exercises is to start my day with the sentence “I am the possibility of ______. I fill in the blank with words like “being a bold leader”,  “generosity”, and my favourite, “being a magnet for yes”.  It’s incredible how often I hear the word “yes” when I use that one.  The point is words are very powerful and our world doesn’t exist without them so my advice to you is choose your words wisely and make them work for you not against you.

If you would like notification of the following steps definitely add your name to the list by subscribing to my blog and if you feel so inclined, leave a comment below!  Thank you for being here now and giving life to my words through your eyes.

PTBS logo 500 pixals

ciao for now, 

lisa

 

 

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